Senior Morgan Webster’s homemade promposal sign that he used to ask junior Gianna Balducci to prom. The sign references the theme of the 2016 SFX theme, Pearl Harbor. Photo by Séarlait Coffey
With prom season on the horizon,
come great promposals. Having trouble
asking that special someone? Look no
further, help has arrived.
1. The Yogurt Trap: First you find
that special someone and make sure
they like frozen yogurt. Second, you go
to their favorite froyo shop. Third, select
a cup size and write “PROM?” on the
bottom of the cup (Do not forget to fill
up the cup with yogurt or this all falls
apart). Fourth, you wait until that spe-
cial someone finishes that froyo. Fifth,
you make reservations at your favorite
restaurant, for your prom dinner. If they
don’t finish their yogurt and get to the
bottom, then you probably don’t want
to take them to prom anyway. No one
wants to dance with a square.
2. The Puzzler: First, you find that
special someone and make sure they like
puzzles. Second, you find a professional
puzzle maker and get a puzzle of you
holding a sign saying “PROM?” Third,
you take your special someone to a
special place (make sure it has a table
big enough to fit your whole finished
puzzle). Fourth, you guys finish the puzzle
together. Fifth, you tweet about your success.
3. Baby kittens. Enough said.
4. The Post-It: First, you go to Of-
ficeMax and buy a lot of Post-Its, with
two different colors preferably. Sec-
ond, you find your special someone’s
car. Third, you spell out Prom with the
sticky notes. Fourth, you sit and wait
and wait and wait until your special
someone comes to their car. Fifth, you
surprise them–be prepared to clean up
all the stickies.
5. The Lumberjack: First, you get a chest hair
booster supplement and eat it. Second, you find a
razor. Third, you shave “PROM?” onto your chest.
Fourth, you show that special someone your chest.
Fifth, you celebrate by eating pancakes.
6. The GOAT: First, you buy a goat. Second,
you dress the goat up to be cute as heck. Third,
you make a sign saying “PRAAAAAAAAAM?”
Fourth, you feed the goat for his great work.
7. The Horse Head: First, you buy a horse mask.
Second, you make a sign saying “No horsing around,
I’m DYING to go to PROM with you.” Third, you say
“Wee Snaw” and gallop away like a majestic creature.
8. The Tennis Ball: First, you buy a lot of
tennis balls. Second, you arrange the tennis
balls saying “PROM?” Third, you tell that
special someone if they beat you in tennis
they have to go to prom with you. Fourth,
you forfeit and get hype, because you are
going to prom.
9. The Tackler: First, you get a football.
Second, you get a super arty pen. Third,
you write “Will You TACKLE PROM with ME?”
Fourth, you tackle your special someone
and it turns into a great hug.
Still having trouble asking your special
someone to prom? Well I got news for your
pal, I got 99 problems, but how you decide
to prompose won’t be one.